Thank you for the pain of delusion

Thank you for showing me how much I can love

Thank you for ignoring my calls and message’s

Thank you for letting me go

Thank you for showing me how cruel and fucked up people can be 

Thank you because of you, I know how strong I am

Thank you because of you, I am a better person

Thank you because of you, I know what I don’t want

Thank you because of you, I know how much people can lie 

Thank you because of you, I know what fake friends look like

Thank you... 

-jb1writes

In vain with a spell bound

to thy eaves within myself, shall I praise and remain untouched by suffering, smiles painted in vain

Oh, what pain in vain against my heart’s forsaken desire that reposes in deep despair claiming enslaving each of my dreams vainly in its winter sea beneath truth’s waves devouring any chance of fate, betraying love’s sweet taste of fruit upon thy breast could you be so cruel

and vain, like death itself?

-jb1writes

Only in these four walls did I learn to live again


Only in these four walls did I feel pain like no other I have ever felt before


Only in these hoarded memories of my past and present entwining behind these four walls did I tear my heart again.


Only in these walls did I learned to love my scars


Only in these walls did crawl and scream for forgiveness


Only in these walls I was forced to face my fears


Only in these walls did I feel grateful for being here

-jb1writes

I feel this light shining down on me

I know it’s you

So I bear my soul every night to you Your the only one that knows me well

So cry to you I trust in you

Because

You lift me up

When there was no one else Your never late always on time

So cry I to you 

I trust in you

I know you’ll be waiting for me when the time is right.

So for now I watch my steps knowing you’re always there my best friend

My light in darkest days

I feel this light shining down on me

I know it’s you

So I bear my soul every night to you

Your the only one that knows me well

So I cry to you 

I trust in you

Because

You lift me up

When there was no one else Your never late always on time

-jb1writes

Coming out of turbulence with a strong mind Standing strong

With a clear view

Knowing my worth

Waiting for the right 

To see me

Hear me

Feel me

Oh, no, no, no more Shame 

No more pain

Yeah that's right no more

I will be true to my self

The imperfections were stepping stones to my soul 

Oh I can see so clearly now

The new feels, so good

Yeah might have a stumble here and there but who wants perfection

That's no longer me

Oh no, no, no more Shame 

No more pain

Yeah that's right no more

-jb1writes

This poem was written in 2019 when I first started writing poetry. I was going through a lot and I only had 4 walls to witness my change.

You are the sulh that walks beneath the cold glare of those lost and looking for thee deity, the one that lights the way to a bright new day

You are the deceiving nædrecynn that drags itself to the ear of the suffering whispering promises of paradise covered with embroideries of the deofol

You have taken thee deity for granted,

and spread sulh in a world crying, and suffering in death into silence;

You will never see thee stand by the side of bealuful

You will never ravish from your own circe covered with blood, of the bealuléas that fell upon thee sætere

You the perfect field, and threat to geléaffulnes and the sulh to the this eardgeard.

 -jb1writes

whomsoever art thou to judge me

when the fathere up heaven stalwart in love’s me so, dost ye feel the neede toe see 'e his face, ine ordere to whate believe i sleight has't seen betroth?

whomsoever art thou to judge me

when am the one thate hast to answer to him

whomsoever touchstone art ye to throw stones at me hime for loving so. 

-jb1writes

Lashing and crashing when thinking of you 

Drowning in sorrow gasping for air

Digging and digging 

Reaching a rigging 

But finding a hole

I know you don’t care that I’ve always been there

Very aware of who’s there

It’s not fair you never cared am always prepared, scared to declare I did care

And here I am

Lashing and crashing when thinking of you 

Drowning in sorrow gasping for air

Digging and digging 

Reaching a rigging 

But finding a hole

Waiting in darkness

Unbecoming this senseless thing

Keep pulling the string you careless bitch 

Trying to stitch you fucken twitch

Looking for answers and finding questions 

Nothing is clear it never has been

And here I am

 Lashing and crashing when thinking of you 

Drowning in sorrow gasping for air

Digging and digging 

Reaching a rigging 

But finding a hole

however whatever whenever 

I will settle the score

I won’t be the one crashing anymore

-jb1writes

Lofian me hnot with your deep honey eyes that touch my skin in vain

Lofian me hnot my heart was beating pit-a-pat,

and put to shame by her eyes unpitied unseen, unheard, unheralded, they were too blind to see pass my declining moon that used to shine brighter than the sun

Lofian me hnot in to abysmal darknesses of an abandoned star that makes no difference where you're gone

Lofian me hnot with or without any avail; that we may one day greet with Indifference cutting down into puddles, of old days before movies could speak.

“They were not present. Yet not farewell”,

Lofian me hnot as though I was nothing more than air! Coming out of an old antiquity. With nothing left but dirt roads with no lights pricking behind my eyes,

Lofian me hnot that you would deceive my crying heart as light when faced with night

Lofian me hnot like the bitter taste of lime when touching the tongue, screaming take and restrain my heart with thee, chains of blooming age, ashamed, afraid to see what might have been.

Oh, Lofian me not. 

-jb1writes

Fell with emotion of not being able to receiveth up on mine own owneth

This t'rture to mine own aching bones yond crave to move on mountain highest peak covered with broken dreams unrealized ambitions of my own almanac.

The love for something new I thought I'd stumbled blindly when a tear dropped as I looked in the glass, of my own self burning with desire to swallow sadness

to see me stride, and never die, but this world I resent in fell for taking away my livelihood essence and dreams of an opportunity untold ignored by those who thought themselves I had no part or even divine ingredients of above.

I am fell, fell, fell with thy

How dareth thee condemned me to a life of despair

 -jb1writes

The world is full of stars.

but when they drop their javelins, their rage resign.

to see what might have been, set us affright.

with his eyes cast down, rots empty hands sit humbly down?

to see what might have been, lifelong purpose of confusing notions: 

far away with his head bowed down in to slumber soothed, loved, honoured among those dupes of destiny blaspheme who claim to know true love of thee.

-jb1writes

“I have tasted death and lived another day”...

When we walk the walk,

we only take memories of love and pain that faded in dreams deep in our eye's never-ending river of light that only shines bright at night up in the sky.

-jb1writes

True love doesn't play or chase it knows nothing of hate or shame only, sweet words with smiles upon each brief hours of sunset kisses on every side, were scarcely touched hardly touched by true love in hours.

-jb1writes

This dragon love 

as blacken dead roots of a rose 

cannot blossom anymore

for when death drew apart made my heart beat loud in vain against the fireing 

blithering of my heart

reminding me of how fragile like crumbling flame may burn,

So easily any effort or dream of my 

Dragon love 

-jb1writes

Ask the moon to

tell you how much I loved you,

ask the cold nights to show you how 

much I loved you.

Ask the wind to blow, and touch your 

cheeks, to feel my souls touch upon your 

skin,

Ask the stars above to let you see how

much time I had to skip to strip these 

eyes from reading; all things that weep,

as I lay there looking back across

looking at the moon begins to shine!

Brighter that night as the night conceives 

itself with my dying heart.

o moon, will you ever talk and show her

the truth.